Communicatng for Love

Another blogger invited me to write a post of relationship advice and my favorite recipe. Here's what I wrote:

Communication is a key ingredient in all relationships, but particularly so in male-female romantic relationships. Most women have accepted that men and women think, interact and process information very differently, but we still tend to feel there is something wrong with it. I know I certainly have felt this way in the past. The newsflash is that different is just different.

So my first tip is this: accept that it is okay that we as women do things a certain way and men do things another. Tip number two is if he has done something that is driving you crazy, consider that he may have no idea why his behavior would drive you crazy or even that it has. Ask him why he is doing it and you may be surprised at his reasoning.

You know how we can talk to our girlfriend on the phone, dispense advice, direct child traffic and cook dinner at the same time? Ever notice how your husband or boyfriend can’t seem to watch football and listen to you vent at the same time? I know, it’s annoying but he isn’t less smart than you. No, there is a very different explanation for this.

Men are single-focused which makes them excellent hunters who can track an animal relentlessly for hours. While we have what’s called diffused awareness. This difference tends to make us great at multi-tasking. Tip number three is don’t ask him to pay attention to you and the football game. Agree upon a time when he is not doing something else so that you can gain his full attention.

Finally, if it is love you’re looking for then do not try to trade sex for it. Be yourself, be passionate, be confident and if he is Mr. Right you will find yourself basking in that delightful laser-like attention so characteristic of a single-focused man.


Soul2soul (A recipe for love)

2 Bags of Southern Mixed Greens (I buy them at Trader Joe’s)
1 large yellow onion
2 cloves of fresh garlic
1 red, yellow or orange bell pepper
1 pound of spicy chicken sausage (you may substitute andouille or chorizo)
1 quart of chicken broth
1 tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil (or substitute your favorite vegetable oil)
1 large non-stick skillet or wok
1 large saucepan

Chop onion & garlic finely, slice bell pepper into small strips, and heat olive oil in wok and Sautee the vegetable mix. Do not caramelize. Add in rinsed greens and cook until wilted (not fried or browned). Slice sausage and add greens and vegetables to the saucepan along with the chicken broth. Simmer mixture until greens are tender to taste. Serve on your best china with a lovely chilled Santa Margherita Pinot Grigot or Frances Coppolla Chardonnay. You may add brown or basmati rice and/or corn muffins. Bon apetit.